Fridat 753 AM
Is today the day I successfully block everything out? That I stay sober?
I spliffed with Chad yesterday
what happened to my brain? I can fix it with meditation. I’ll work on the pomodor time schedule today, with these tasks
I'm committed to no more commitments I'm on my own time everyone can suck it and will in go home christian attitudes if you know no on knows I making a music video just watch my video Im serious though
Friday 927 AM
Okay at least I haven’t had alcohol in a while. Def need to start on a keto only diet today.
setting up the studio in the room. It’s a little sad that I am already having withdrawals a bit- looks like I went a little too hard on the paint.
Speaking of exess uses of little i
why why my parents are plebs and I never got over it grover beach getting to crowded so I hike or die cause everything in my life is do or die pay your dues I tell myself pay your dues one day myself will be able to
Frida 959 AM
Today is the first day I’m sober still this long. Lol it’s only 10 AM . I’m making a big deal out of it, I mean being awake for this long without doing some fix. I really grew to hate my house back up in SC - because something wouldn’t work then I would get a second wind too early, cause we know it’s all about that second wind around 5 pm.
I’m organizing files and this time, it’s going to work. I have minimal distractions here at my parents house. I spent the morning organizing files and while when I have to wait for my POS faptop - I have been setting up the studio here. I really wanna throw down on some more gretsch as a reward.
yesterday I spent most of the day helping chad with registering the salvage car title stuff. It didn’t go that well and we left it at - in 2 day Tmobile will send me a list of all my phone call history, so that we can try and track down that guy that sold us the car.
I doubt we’ll get in contact with him, and I doubt further that he will help us.
will I always feel estranged from society? Cause that’s all I know. But then there are so many times when that is simply not the case.
I’m not eating yet because I want to go go keto but there is limited keto food in the kitchen. I think my food stamps re upped today so I wanna go shopping, but don’t want to stop working here. So I think I’ll fast and then try and go later tonight right before TJs closes.
Fridat 1056 AM
alright alright I got arcade working
got 40 gigs of shit off my laptop so it’s running better
I started on a new Vault 36 master folder for sounds
which I’ll then upload
I still haven’t talked to anyone back in SC
I’m eloping by myself
just going to be sober in this white room with one whole wall as a mirror
and going to just go ham on churning out music videos.
the simpler the better. If I set parameters then I’ll be able to go faster. but damn it’s not just about that. I don’t know. I’m going crazy honesty to god .
thank god I have music otherwise I’d be fucked.
I can go sober way easier cause of it
Frdat 12 17
tomorrow is dan’s celebration since getting better from cancer
I just talked to him for a second after grabbing my tripod and mic from chad’s house.
poliw.at is down.
so many to host
so many to see
friday 130 PM
darlene has a bf I early riser now my finger nail has more motivation than your post why would I wanna be the best when history shows the beset are shot misused and abused
I just lost my cell phone please don't call sister though mail me your business cards I could use some crutches think of you through a toke a smoke I stoked on this one
jehso two worlds
two worlds inside your mind each moment suspended disbelief give me a sentence please just the right one today is the day I that block it all out into pillows over past talk I shout late at night can't sleep on the clock all the time is running out that why I running by to pick up my mic from chad to play a gretsch from dad to hurl stones I mad just quit smoking me when I'm smoking and toking and me when I riding party waves of sobriety to every partay two worlds left brain then right freestyle I mike you had me at garlic fries
tuesdat 924 PM